15weeks and 2 days..

26 Jan 2010

Went to dr ang today... baby is growing well :) Gender?? We all cannot see!! but.. if he were to make a guess.. it would be a girl.. but dr ang cannot confirm yet cause we could hardly catch a glimpse of that "part" for more than 3 sec! -.-

Very notti bb...

But hor.. i was a little upset that it would be a girl.. but after a quick nap.. i woke up and suddenly i told myself.. haiya.. i planning to have 3.. why i worry so much? hahaha.. ya lor! i think it must be the pregnancy emo la.. super overwhelming.. i read pple blog about how they love their hubby, how they thank their family.. the tears will come out liao.. SUPER emo...

i have not gained a weight for the last 1 mth but bb is growing faster than me! haha... shall post the scan soon ok? Its with ah lao's iphone..

My appetite not too good.. can only eat small portions.. durain also can eat max 2 hootss.. anything more than that... it will all end up in the plastic bag...

Sat, i sweep + mop floor.. wash laundry 3 times and monitor the clothes.. haha.. i was soooo shag that i slept from 8 PM to 11 AM!!!! hahaha.. I only remember waking up to PEE!

Speaking of pee... haizz.. im back to the peeing game again.. from the moment i sleep till i wake up... chao chao pee like... 3-4 times? sometimes im too tired that i loon.. and i loon until i can dream about me being "urgent" -.-

Today itself.. i can pee twice in 5 mins.. and i cannot sit long, cause it will press on my bladder and i feel like peeing again.. (like now, as im typing lor)

Argh!! Ok... my emo is coming again..

And.. to my ah lao:

Thanks for spending the 2 nights with me staying outside.. thou a big hole in our pocket.. but... it really helped.. i can feel that my pregnancy felt so relieved.. Im sorry that we (bb and me) had to make u hold back ur opportunity to venture into something more stable.. But dear, if u think that u shud make that step.. u kah kah ki.. i will support u de.. jus like how u always support me in whatever decisions i make, be it i fall or succeed. Dont worry about me or our pockets.. God gave us another chance.. God will have a path for us to walk.. Like what i told u that night.. Nothing can make me fall.. unless i want to fall myself. So u dont worry about me.. U have given me more than i expected.. Im very gan ji alr.. When its time for u to fly.. i will be with u (oh!! and of coz our bao bei too!) Thanks for everything ah lao... li tio si wa eh ai lin lah! kekeke

Constipated

21 Jan 2010

Im not pooing!!!! argh!! Well.. it seems to be normal for preggies.. but its definitely a buay song thing lor... Making me so mang zang!!

Just went to a neighbourhood salon to do my hair and prep for CNY... Went for an appt to get some work done...

Niece is far away in Changi having her camp... I think its a very good thing la.. hope she change to be more independent and not so xiao jie.. haha... good break for her after 3 weeks of chasing after her spellings and ting xies... silly syllabus is making kids soooo overwhelmed...

Anyway! im gg to be 15 weeks in 2 days! Im not even half way there.. lol... Well.. im happy that im not overly excited and not very cautious about things like.. making myself worry la... but the fear will soon step in once i can feel the movements.. i hope i can overcome!

Sometimes i jus feel like letting go.. but sometimes i really bo pian

MIL jus told me to let loose the kids a bit... let them finish lunch and rest then do homework... i think my FIL told her to tell me..

I was very angry when i heard this.. i explained to both of them..

Both of them reach home at 230pm... Jiayi tuition at 330pm.. They took their time to eat till 3pm... asked jiayi what homework she has.. she has compre and chinese to do... i asked her to complete them before tuition.. at least the chinese first... cause her tuition is ending at 5pm... and by the time she dilly delly will be 5+pm.. then time for dinner.. and she will watch tv.. then she wont complete her homework.. and she gotta learn her chinese and english spelling... but this good girl completed her eng and chinese homework before tutor come and after tuition, she rest all way... Am i wrong? If i were to leave everything till after tuition, she cannot finish.. its not that i dun wan her to do later but... theres no time...

Eamon... he is having flu.. after lunch, i got him to complete his spelling corrections, fed him medicine and get him to shower then ask him to sleep at 315pm.. why? after med, he drowsy, he will sleep till dinner time... if i get him to shower, then he wont have to shower in the night catching another cold... and after medication, he will be drowsy, then he cannot do homework cause drowsy ma... so rather that he sleep and get drowsy all the way till SIL bring them home to rest...

Taking care of the 2 kids is not at our own time own target.. its proper planning... making sure nothing gets affected... after recess, they also go back to class and study... whats the diff? plus, its only tuition days that everything needs to rush..

I let go for a long time.. didi's attitude becoming worse... its easy to let go.. but it can take up to 1 year to grab them back to track... then what can we do? cane them? no! its consistent monitoring.. im not a kiasu person.. but instead of everyday grabbing the child back, why not keep them on track and nurture them? Im not a unreasonable ah kim.. but how long do i have them with me? once they go to sec sch, then i regret and cry over spilled milk? why they have their friend to influence them then i grab back? too late...

I never believe in lettting them grow by themselves.. this is what my mom did to me.. and i had to go thru everything the hard way..

its not easy guiding 2 kids.. they are jus my niece and nephew, i have my limitations and i try not to cross the border.. there are things that its not up to me to say NO. but everytime when i get reprimanded by ILs, i want to let go.. but.. in my heart, i know... i cannot be a selfish person.. these are little minds, little lives that we cannot jus neglect like tat... its a life that parents bring to earth.. its our responsibility to guide them to track and bring them to a place where they can fly. Its very selfish jus to "let them be" and later cane or scold them for their misbehave..

If we wanna bring them here, we need to do our part.. these 2 kids are very very dear to me... i cannot give up.. cause my mom gave up or didnt try or jus keep telling me to follow the path myself.. i was lost at a moment and end up taking the wrong route..

Jia yi was lost.. it took all of us 1 year to bring her back... 1 year, she lost too many things.. now.. she is working hard, playing hard.. and loving herself... i hope didi will be like her..

I know there are more complains from the old folks to come.. but i will endure.. its not easy to be a guiding star but i will make sure i shine high and bright and see these 2 kiddos grow up proper and be well.

Im into my 2nd tri!!

13 weeks and 5 days

Fella is start to tap on me! Ytd, i was coughing very hard on the bed... and when i stop.. fella was tapping on me machiam telling me.. "hello mommy?! slowly! u r disturbing my sleep!!" Alvin felt the tap too!

Nausea is still there... Feeling all aching and quizzy (i cannot find a better word to describe liao)... Seeing Dr Ang on 25th Jan.. its gonna be another heart panic for me lor.. everytime wanna see dr, always very scared.. after the visit, i will be all happy...

How i wish i can faster see dr ang and feel happy...

Me...

I wish... i have the energy and time... Emo is getting all over me... Worried about ballot, HLE, fella and CNY!! hahaha.. CNY is always a very tiring thing for me... i hope CNY faster come... And the date... 22nd Feb is always on my mind.. The day when my life stop and takes another route.. Coming to a year liao... Julius is always on my mind... I love u boy...

Happy things

Er... food?? I get to eat my ba kut teh and many many things!! I think im gg to get alvin buy durian for me later... i LOVE durian!!

我的心很乱

So many things for me to think... i feel like no one sharing with me this burden.

Maybe i shud heed shen po's advice.. not to think about other things.. jus think of good things. i feel that.. i dun haf privacy... everyone thinks that im talking rubbish.. must wait until i cannot contain anymore then regret that they never hear me speak?

Hai...

My mattress spoil le... wanna get a new one but was adviced not to cause im preg... :( its very very uncomfortable... how? what shud i do? Alvin everyday play game play game... i can hardly speak to him about these things... but anyway, i think putting 2 thin mattress to tahan first lor

Hear no evil and be happy!

Updates...

Me: I cant eat much o/w i will puke
Her: I used to eat a big bowl. u dun eat, later u wanna find food again
Me: I cannot eat.. no space to put.. later puke
Her: Must be a girl, very selective, jing pai si (very naughty)

BTO
188 available (4m) vs 1296 applications
-.-|||

Told the folks that i applied but nothing confirm...
She: ya, my relative children also apply. They say dun stay together(with the married couple) better

FIL didnt look happy at first. but i told him that if batok kena enbloc in years time, i will sell the cck flat and pay for their new flat. ask him dun worry... then he happy a bit.. :) FIL's the best

Tomorrow
Busy. Holland V - TPY (HDB) - BUGIS - CCK - IMM
WHERES MY ADIDAS SNEAKERS???

Fella
Ytd... i felt a light tap. not kick.. a tap.. not gas, or anything like tat... it happened when i was lying down... :)

Will i have the ticket?

5 Jan 2010

Recd a sms today from HDB on a new BTO at CCK... jus nice alvin at home.. so we went to check it out online....

1. 3 bus stops away from CCK Mrt
2. Behind got big NPC
3. max max 4 rm at 278k
4. BTO complete in 2014

Well.. the completion date is something im comfy of.. the Dawson one is 2016 lor.. too far liao.. i need to be ready for enbloc for my mom side or alvin's side... if i take commit to something too far (time) away... then im losing control of my plans...

Here.. its a bit small liao our new addition.. Friends who come to my house would understand.. i hardly can put a baby cot in my room... Its time also la.. i know commitments and stuff.. but... here is too sardine-d liao..

Sometimes, when u gotta do it, u gotta do it.. we hope to get the ticket la.. now nothing confirm... hope we can move along and jian zhao chai zhao lor..

From HDB website

Too tired to complete all my tasks

I got plenty of things to do... but hor... i got no energy.. everyday i try to complete 1 -2 things..

I need to settle one impt thing soon.. i need to make sure i have a peaceful mind with only good things in my head.... shall get a cute baby picture and keep looking at it... need to listen to sweet baby lullaby...

too many negative vibes arnd me.. i need to make them go...

I want to see my mom.. and i miss her food.. I dun wan egg and chai por and luncheon meat liao.. Im gg to call mama tmr and talk to her.. i will need to call insurance coy tmr...

Fang wedding present is on the way.. but the supplier is very jia lat.. machiam dun wanna do biz.. but besides him.. no one can do it liao... :( managed to get in touch with him together.. hope everything will go on smoothly...

Kiddos' tuition arrangement seems quite messy now.. but now waiting for his eng tutor to confirm with me the time again..

I need to get info from my boss to start the ball rolling again.. and i need to hand in some stuff to the other boss...

I need to go bank too..

Mother birthday on 19th, i need to buy chang shou mian and bring it to her..

But again... i can do a few things at a time...

I stop taking my multi vits cause its very heaty... but im very guilty.. but gynae say dun eat its ok de... but if i eat... i constipate... how?

MIL is driving me nuts... I wanna get some peace....!!

Argh... due to hormones... im very emo.......

HAPPY 2010

1 Jan 2010

This post also marks the 300th post :)

Well.. A good start of a new year... Leave all the bad memories behind and start afresh..

Good news for a start? Dino is officially 12 weeks pregnant as of 2nd Jan 2010.. EDD is on 17 July 2010! 28 weeks to go! It wasnt a planned one.. in fact.. we sorta gave up...

Dont congrats me until i pop.. Cause we are still in the race... But we still remain positive.. :)

Fella came when i was making big plans to go holiday, change of career directions and my life.. Just as i set my mind to enjoy a good marriage life with Alvin.. God sent us a perfect gift for the both of us to nurture and make it happen..

Dr Ang is trying his best to materialise this pregnancy too.. Every visit to his clinic was heart throbbing.. Fears and memories will jus come back to me.. But we have gone past twice... And last visit, fella was moving (cycling + mahjong)... lol..

This pregnancy was not a relaxing one... morning sickness (MS) haunting me from day till night.. Small appetite but tons of meals (Im actually on a 3 hourly feed ok)... All my likes in the past are now my "dislikes".. and... Im loving what alvin loves to eat and hating what he hates to eat... Peeing in the middle of the night and a new MS compared to Julius' time... - PUKING...

My goodness...

When Dr Ang hears this.. he is happy! He say.. "good good.. thats great" -.-

It actually shows that the hormones are increasing and stuff which are good signs that fella is growing and developing well.. lol.. how nice.... -.-

Anyway... Dr Ang say... Next week we can know the gender liao! hahaha.. Girl will sweet.. and boy will be good.. But after Julius, we doesnt really matter anymore.... As long as we can materialise this.. Every pregnancy is different, every child is unique.. I wont take this pregnancy lightly...

Alright, here's a glimpse of our bao bei...

For those who are trying their best to figure out...... (Left side: Legs Right side: Head) See the 2 little things sticking out on the left? Thats the legs.. Dont worry, fella will show us a better view in 3 weeks' time!

Wishing everyone and ME.. hao shi lian lian... shun shun li li..