Dreams.. Dreams...

I had a funny dream last night... Dreamt of my first love! haha.. The first love not meaning first bf.. but first guy i loved. An egoistic man who is highly confident about himself. Even a prideful girl like me was conquered by him... Haha!! But honestly, the 2.5 years spent with him, i learnt quite a lot from him.. I stayed with him for a year or so, being rebellious and naughty at that time, i didnt think much and just wanted to be with someone i love. I had great times with his whole family (including aunties & uncles), learning cookery, traditional recipes and family warmth.

His mom was a SUPERWOMAN... i respect her a lot till now. She is a intelligent lady who can take care of her family and take care of her business as well. She taught me much and also went thru a lot of her tests thou... (heh)

His dad, very similar to his character but his dad is someone who accepts and listens. Stubborn at times, but he learns to accept. It took his dad some time to accept me and the acceptance started when i met him at a PUB! And we ended up talking in the car back, talking about life, thoughts, dreams. The only regretful thing i felt was the time when he was admitted after his morning jog. My mom didnt allow to let me go to the hospital (superstitious reasons), and my ex was so angry with me cause his dad was looking for me when he woke up. Till now, i feel very guilty, and since then, i had never seen his dad cause we broke up shortly after that.

His sister, a unique name, a unique personality. I respect her as much and i feel that she is a very capable young lady who seeks freedom yet holds on to her responsibility. I enjoyed the times chatting with her and seeking advice from her too.

This dream of mine, stir up a lot of my thoughts, past, sweet & harash moments. A lot of "what ifs" came up to my mind, and now that he is no longer in contact with me, and his still unwilling to open up his mind and thoughts. There are many questions i would like to ask him too. I heard from our friend that he did ask about me in their meet up session, and my friend's mom advice me not to think about it since his so ego and nasty. But then again, there are some things you know you wont forget for life.

After departing for 6 years, the memories are still locked in my memories. Even without thinking about it, i still can dream of him! And he looks fierce in that dream thou... haha... Well, if i were to be on my death bed today, he is one person i would like to see for the last time too. Even thou we had our fights during our relationship, still, this first love was well spent, real, honest and true. I guess we should put those xiao hai zi hua (childish anger) aside, those happen cause we were still young. Now that we are grown ups, thinkings and mindsets have changed, im sure there are much to catch up.. But i would only wan to see him when im parting.. haha... cause i scared he will look fierce upon seeing me alive! hahahaahaha