Little Updates

Ok.... My boss decided to let me sign the transfer papers during my pregnancy... The entire story is really ridiculous... and i am totally sian over what had happened and what is happening... Having a baby is so tiring and still.. i gotta go thru all these... its a miracle how the depression didnt manage to come in...

Now going thru the 2nd trimester of the pregnancy liao... still tired, but i realise that i can pull thru the entire day feeling awake more frequently but i will end up sleeping at 9pm... hahaha... I am a water retained mommy.... whole body "hum hum"... damn ugly looking... my complexion is damn terok... Compared to the first trimester, i think i am starting to face appearance changes...!! hahaha.. thank god i no need to do sales liao... if not, my customers see my face, sure faint...

Was so angry with my boss... i forgot to update u guys on the baby progress!! haha... the last visit to the gynae, i managed to see my baby move! haha... waving and cycling... den the gynae was saying... "this is baby's future legs and hands.." den i got to hear the heartbeat again.. this time was so fast... guess because baby's exercising ba.. hahaha....

Baby is now 5cm... 4cm growth in a month... haha...

Havent been eating as much as my first trimester... i refrain myself from durains.. but i enjoy spicy food and fruits... haha... die also must eat fruits... Haiz... i hope my water retention go away fast...

Peeing in the middle of the night is so norm to me liao... Understand is that the baby is rest on my bladder, so i cant "ren" as long as before, or.. even there is little liquid, i still have to go toilet pee... I cant refrain from drinking water because it will make my rentention worse... so i have to bear with it lor...

Heard that 2nd tri should be the "enjoying" part of the pregnancy... everything is stable down (hormones especially).. my mood swings (temper) is subsiding.. regaining my energy.. but slowly... I hope everything is back to normal asap... :(

I miss the normal days.........

I may lose my job

Last Thurs, my boss tells me a thousand and one reasons why he is asking me to leave... Well, it all started with applying for 2 days leave... initially he asked me to choose 2 days to take leave in Oct before i got transferred... so i did.. then he said.. "den why not u do until this month end?"

Of course i questioned him la... den he told me about sales figures, attendance, attitude etc... u know, in sales, its like tat... they can just pick anything and u sure die... admin jobs are easier, u dun make big mistakes, u are safe...

then when i told him.. "u r the one who allow me to take leave de.. (with some recollections)" den he say "ok lor. the decision is up to u..." guess what? when i told him i wanna stay, he sms me "let me sort things out and decide. will let u know when u are back from ur leave"

hahaha... see... its obvious right?

I didnt want to post such things out.. but i guess i need to vent it out...

With my having a baby now, soon gonna be maternity... in fact, preg mommies very very tough to focus at work, very hard to keep on track because of the fatigue and stuff like tat... and having to lose ur job during ur pregnancy... i tell u... its disaster...

but if i really lose my job, i will get temp jobs to tong first... cause i still need an income ma... but i wont tender the job...

keep u posted

Changes Taking Place

I will be transferring to a inbound job due to my pregnancy.. for about 3 months - 4 months till i get to work from home then give birth and maternity... I dunno if i can take it, but i guess i just gotta bite that bullet and just pull thru these couple of months till everything's over...

At home, i feel really restricted... i need privacy, and i dun like to walk arnd the place with my in laws at home... see, when i do my laundry, my in laws grumble that i need to do them at the same time as them... When i close the doors, my in laws close theirs to show dismay... when i told them i need to hang out clothes that are not dry, she insist that they are dry and showed me one face...

I got nothing better to do at home... i am too tired to go out, if i do, i cant stay out walking for more than 3 hours, otherwise i get dizzy and lazy... When i go work, i feel so so so tired... But for the bucks, i gotta pull thru man...

Having to take naps has become so natural... I'm so afraid that my body will get used to naps... but my body needs that rest that is why i get so tired. even after naps, i still can go to bed at 10pm... (btw, i dun nap in the past)

Alvin works during the weekends, so i feel that im in jail and confined... i cant go back mom's place cause mom's busy with her stuff... den where else? At times, i really feel like checking into a good hotel, soak in the bath tub, go for a swim and just lie on the bed... but the thought of packing up and going back home brings me down again...

pre natal depression? nah... i think im going crazy but not to that extent... as i sit on my chair, how i wish my baby's right there in my arms... but the thought of my in laws stopping me from guiding my baby erks me...

I need a shelter, i need to get out of their sight... but how?

I need a break... Really....

Going towards my 9th Week

I hope this fatigue leaves me quickly....

Sometimes, im very energetic, sometimes damn tired... And i am losing my momentum totally at work.. not because of the passion.. because baby seems to be more attention seeking than i thought...

Im having cramps where baby is... and this baby also very mood swing... i was dining with my colleagues the other day at the steamboat... then ordered a lot of food.. once the food arrived, i lost my appetite...!! wa lan.. but durain after that... i totally had no rejections... si mi lai eh? sabo me lei...

I also realise that i have water retention everywhere... my arms can look big today, but tmr it will go back to normal, then my legs look big... den no where can big liao, den my tummy starts to bloat... but recently, the bloating tummy is ok liao... i think because i stop drinking milk... cause my mom told me not to..

Usual Cravings: Fries, Durain, Strawberries, Cakes
Current Cravings: Mango, Mushroom Swiss Burger

Haha... i'm going to meet my customer at west mall later for discussion... and he offered to buy me dinner... feel like gg to BK for the mushroom swiss... but i think i'll look ugly eating burgers in front of customers.. hahahahahhaha... so i think i will buy home to eat later.... sigh, means i will go hungry for a while... :(

I walked in the rain a bit today... now feeling a bit feverish.. hahaha.. notti me... but i dun wanna be those ku niang mommies who needs to be held, sheltered, helped everytime ma.... hahaha... TI KI (metal teeth)....

Ok la... gtg meet customer liao.. this deal comes in... hahahahahha... i will take a break liao.... hahahhaha... baby baby... help mommy ok? muacks

Finally i get to see my baby!!

Went to Dr Lawrence Ang today... cheap rates + funny guy... im comfortable with him compared to the previous gynae i went...

Herez the picture of my baby... i wonder you guys can figure out which is the head, legs and the cord.... hee... I realise that baby has a big butt like mommy!! hahaha...cute hor? er.. i find it cute la... hahaha.. its 19mm, an increament of 5mm in 2 weeks! hee... For the first time i heard baby heart beat... pretty loud thou... Hee...

My EDD (Est delivery date) is 3rd May 2009... How i wish i can tong until 10 May.. then we can celebrate birthday together... and baby shall be my mother's day gift!!!!! hee....

Cant wait for my next gynae check up on 15 Nov.. then have to do the down syndrome test... :)

I'm Not Happy

Sometimes i feel tortured... i feel like going back home to my mom... Going thru the first trimester = fatigue. You can read that everywhere online... After the first trimester, you will not feel that tired liao... And obviously, i will start to take naps or sleep earlier than usual.

My sis in law was asking me to go to the room for a nap if im tired... But my mom in law was like.. "sleep? dun sleep so much. later the baby very big." ok... those reading this... u can start saying what u feel out of ur mouth... cause when i told my mom about this... her reply was... "jiao wei" (in hokkien.. Talk cock in english) I seldom hear my mom speak vulgarities... yup...

I felt like shit... and im still feeling like shit.

29 more weeks to go...

Slightly better this week... But still cannot shop too long, walk too long...

My boss offered me another job position, so that i no need to run arnd for sales... Pros and Cons la.. I am still in deep thoughts about it.... Having baby alr let me lose a lot of my favourite hobbies and food... like... MY MAGGIE MEE... i miss my maggie mee u know? but my mom say maggie mee is not good for baby.. I also dun play pool cause i think i will have difficulties bending down liao...

My tummy is growing... i am only 7 weeks preg and i haf to wear maternity pants... what u think? dino mommy = dino baby... from the pic below, you can see the baby is on my left side, and my tummy is growing on my left side too... haha... so cute..

this baby is starting to have some bonding with me.... i tell u, u all might think im crazy... but hor, if u use ur heart to feel the baby... it will communicate de... this is how i managed to quit smoking... I was still struggling to quit and having to "stop thinking" about picking up a cig. Since i know that i got baby, i cut down so so much... as of today, i barely can finish a stick. the moment i start to light, my tummy starts bubbling... (havent smoke yet)... then i feel that my baby is protesting... hahaha.. so i extingust the stick immediately, and left for work. then, each time i see that pack on my table, i think of baby.. den i jus let it "lao hong" on my table.... I'm not proud about it, in fact, i very sad that i cannot quit faster. :(

But now that i can say, i got no more addictions, no more cravings for nicotine... im happy...

The only thing that makes me wanna puke the moment i think of it, is the supplements i am taking every morning... i never had probs taking med, bitter liang teh... my mom is proud that i never had to eat a sweet when she cook liang teh for me in the past. But u know, i have to prepare a sour plum when i eat my supplements every morning.. this is how bad it is... (even typing my exp now, makes me wanna puke)


But seeing my tummy grow day by day... its also very nice feeling la... I wonder whats life gonna be after this little rascal come to earth....

Cravings for the day: DURIAN

Whos the CULPRIT?

Wanna see who did all these to me?

Thanks for him/her.. I have been suffering from bloating tummy, morning sickness, fatique, hunger, emo....

Measuring 14mm by 6.4mm... THE CULPRIT!!!
Age: 6 weeks as of picture (3 Sept 08)



Haha.... After some measurements....

I was a 36 Cup, now.. I'm 38 Cup... my boobs are huge! I realise that the veins are out too... :( Need to spend money buy nursing bras!! Argh... FINALLY I AM a A CUP!!!! DOUBLE A SOMEMORE... (Credits: http://www.motherhood.com/size.asp?website_Id=1&MasterCategory_Id=0 )

(I dunno which part shud i count this... We shall name it BABY BUMP)
I dunno what is my previous... Hmm, was that suppose to be waist line? hahahha... Tell me on my tag board! hahaha

Baby Baby.. Just For You

I am not a supplement person... And for that somebody in me... I am really swallowing them to make sure that this somebody is gonna be a healthy, cute and bubbly one...

Yes... Morning sickness, nausea what have u... ugly face, tired... and of coz, a fat body cause no one realise that its actually a bump, for the fact that i am alr FAT. argh...

But i know that the things that i am struggling to eat are good for the both of us... Here are some tips for some MTBs... (credits from http://www.pregnancy-calendars.net)

Is Magnesium Safe During Pregnancy?
There are many benefits to ensuring that you are receiving sufficient magnesium in your diet. Manganese plays an important role in the formation of bone, teeth, cartilage, development of your babys inner and outer ears as well as the assists certain enzymes to function properly.
Not only will Magnesium help with those developmental functions, but taking a magnesium supplement while pregnant may also help prevent premature labor. One other pleasant effect of taking magnesium is that it could possibly reduce pregnancy related leg cramping and heartburn.

Protein During Pregnancy
Protein plays an extremely important part in your pregnancy and the development of your baby. The amino acids which make up protein also form the basic building blocks of your body's cells — which in turn also form the building blocks of your baby’s body too.
During the second and third trimester is when you should make sure your protein levels are where they should be, especially as this is when your baby will be growing it’s fastest and that means placing more demand on you for all his/her essential nutrients.

Calcium Intake During Pregnancy
Both you and your developing baby need calcium during your pregnancy. Your baby needs the calcium to grow strong bones, teeth, a healthy heart, nerves, and muscles, normal heart rhythm and blood clotting abilities. You need the additional calcium because your baby is going to be drawing from your calcium in order to grow and develop and if you are not getting enough
calcium for yourself, both you and your baby will suffer.

Folic Acid During Pregnancy
Folic acid - also known as vitamin B9 or folate - is one of the few nutrients which is known to prevent neural tube birth defects such as spina bifida and those women who receive the recommended daily amount will reduce the risk of such birth defects by up to 70%.
This statistic alone should be enough to make you want to ensure that you are receiving the correct amount of folic acid. There are of course other complications which may be avoided if your folic acid intake is sufficient, and these include:
Miscarriage Cleft lip and palate Limb defects Heart defects Blood clots Placental abruption

Plan With Care

Im trying my best to plan a lot of stuff with care... I need to adjust, adapt and perhaps give up some stuff... I am hoping to be able to keep something very precious to me... Honestly, im not sure if some things can turn out the same way i wan it to be... but if it doesnt, i still hope that everything will be alright...

I know i cant make the same mistake again

Today, should be a happy day... But before getting happy, i have many things to settle...

From today onwards, i may lose the best thing i ever had, the usual habits i have, the common things i used to do... i dun even know if i can have it back... But i know, i will never make the same mistake again. Everyone makes mistakes, but when u know u made a mistake, u cannot make the same mistake again. Opportunities to repent, to salvage are hard to come by... Now that i have it, i cant do wrong anymore.

I know its gonna be tough, but i will learn to adapt and get used to it.

For now, i just wanna remember that i have to be a happy person, make myself a happy person from today onwards. And i cant look back and regret, if not, i will be living in misery.

Getting New Phone!!!

Finally my starhub voucher is coming on Friday!!! Waiting and waiting only.... Hee...

Anyway, im planning to get a Samsung Omnia... Was thinking of getting HTC Touch Dual at first, after reading some comments online, i decided that $500 voucher - $498 (Omnia) is more wu hua... den my current HTC, i will sell it off... then i get the money and get a Touch Dual?? haha.. i got 2 sim cards now.. thinking of seperating my personal calls and work calls... Either that, or i get a camera using the money?? Hee.. *excited*



Im quite sian of using touch screen to do sms... i miss "tiak tiak tiak" sound on keypads... this thinking is more like "huan xiong" than anything else.. haha!!

Hmm, i still got $250 vouchers that i can redeem from my starhub points... how how how?? Hmm.... what shud i do with it? or should i get a new phone for my mama?? **ponders**

WE WILL MISS YOU, MACDONALD'S GARLIC CHILLI

Sigh, out all things they did, they just have to stop the garlic chilli... and its all serving Sin Sin chilli now.. haizzzz... sad man...

Just finish watching Singapore team playing table tennis... of coz China won again, but i think Singapore did a great job... To make themselves up there, i think its not easy.. its an experience and we will be there again 4 years later!!!

Sigh, sales is really lousy... like what shen po told me... everything this mth is bad.. work + money + love... sigh..... how how how?? im emo again... stress stress stress

Happy Birthday Singapore

Having to spend the most beautiful moments... Capturing Every Beautiful Moment...

美丽的时光虽短斩，但如果你在那短斩的时间是最光芒的，那也可能就是你一身的成就了。。。

Brace Up and Continue The Race

Work is frustrating... Dont understand why im not getting things that i want... and the problem is... i feel like everything is going the wrong way... sigh... lets not talk about work...

Im IN LOVE with this LV Galliera PM Bag which will cost me $2k... And yes.. I AM going to get it... and I MUST get it... i dun care... Hmph... i longing for a bag that i can wear for long... anytime, anywhere.... I WILL GET IT...

Haha... Okok.. need to get that tot off my mind... if not spend money... haha

My first photo with my Hot Mommy Elaine!!!!!!



My Hot Aiai Mommy...!~~

I cannot tolerate zero, do u have many eca?

haha... these words are ringing in my ears....

i need sales, need numbers... i wanna be a "smart cow"

i worked hard, i not guilty... i know its coming. so pls b patient.

I dun give excuses, sales have no excuses... no number = havent been working

so dino, where are ur numbers??

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saw this vending machine in holland village.. hmm.. can they have something like tat for cig?

Some random pics of the colleagues prawning.. HAHA... we had a great night with all the chattings.. but was damn damn shag...


Back into my working files... on a Saturday morning... Yawns....

I feel that i am getting older day by day...

Sigh, even thou im jus 24, but i feel that there are many things that i shud be doing... See, im married, but i have no babies... I am working in sales, but im not saving enough... and many many examples.. Sometimes i wish im still 18

I need to know what i want, then throw those that i dun wish to keep... and live a clean and neat life... See, now that i know my debts are soon to clear, i need to set a goal.. something i wan to achieve...

So, after i settle my debts, hopefully in sept, i wanna to go for a course (casino management), den i will take up language courses like korean/jap/thai... thereafter, i wanna change my career directions. I wanna have children and i think im ready to have them while i am studying and working.. once i give birth and finish my course, i will go towards the career path that i want to go into and raise my kids and be someone.

i know i might take on a lot of hardships and stuff like tat... but i guess all these are easier than having debts for the past few years. Since i'm finally settling them... i think its time to cast some things into stones and move on. I also wanna retire early when sufficient money to take care of my kids and the rest of my life.

I dun wanna live too long... perhaps till 65 - 70 will do. its not easy to live your life alone. children will one day leave you, have their family... and you will be alone... its not nice living life alone anyway... so 65-70 shud be enough.

So... Why am i born to be a human, leading life that a human leads, doing things that many humans do? Sometimes i jus wonder, why humans need to do all these to survive? cant we all have a choice not to do it and not be hungry and poor?

Is this gonna be my turning point?

Many changes in the office, many feelings evolved... I dunno why, but... i feel that everyone is tired... as tired as me

Work is drowning me... Deals are floating around, i aint sure when can i cast them into stones and fulfill my dreams, and let this be my turning point for this pharse of my life...

Sigh

Anyway, went prawning with my team of colleagues yesterday night. To tell you honestly, i was really very shag at work le.. But i dont wanna be a spoiler... so i went together... Having to carry so many working files, laptop, my bag and stuff... I really cant move off earlier without any cabs or public transport... Plus to find a cab there is quite tough.

But who knows, i didnt become a spoiler yesterday, but i was too tired to even open my eyes to sms my colleague to tell him i cant make it for mj today... Im really sorry guys... If you happen to read this some where... Pai seh...

But honestly, i appreciate a lot of my colleagues for being forgiving and understanding... Prob because my colleagues know what kind of working environment we are in... There were times when we are in the midst of something, and the other person has to leave... Yet we never got pissed off.. There were times like this, where i was too tired and stress that they never blamed me for flying their kite.. (one of my colleague came frm tampines!)

Because they know what kinda things to expect and we all give and take...

Thanks pals!

I have never been so busy working in Adventus.. Only recently, when i got some cases handed over.. I began to understand that when you are busy, tired, stressed, pressured.. The only thing that warms your heart is when you realise that your friends never got pissed off for you being late.. Your colleagues listens, advices, understands for the biggest cock up you ever made, sending you to your early appointments, waking up a little earlier to make sure you wake up on time.. Giving a lift to office and help you to settle your misc. paper work... your family who never blame you for coming back home late from office and disturbing their sleep... Even at times when i doze off on the table working, they will pack my things in my bag and make sure i dun forget to bring them for work when i rushed for work the next day.

All these happenings, these little things that they might not even put in their hearts... Meant a lot to me... It was all of these important pple in my life that makes my stressful and tiring job a smoother and easier work flow.

Now i understand what it is like to have a bunch of buddies with me... And this is why, each time anyone leaves me, its very sad.

Jus for u!!

Weekends are over...

Sat and Sun always past so so fast wor... But at least today i got do laundry, housework and facial! haha... tiring week and more tiring starting from tomorrow onwards..

Jus any one of the cases comes in, it'll prob turn my life around... I pray really hard this time... Jia you dino!!

Surfing thru youtube.. some clips are really CUTE!! Check these out.. I love the whatever baby!!

Busy Busy

I feel very happy and challanging working here... each cases is different, each time u handle a case is always very fun and challanging... but then again, its damn tiring wor... but still its nice having this kinda feeling la..

Work work and work... im very scared i cannot hit my target this mth wor.. but if my cases do come in... Its gonna change my life... And yes, it is that impt to me.. each case is as impt.. i hope to get them right and close 'em off...

Tmr will be a siong day, got site survey to do... Elaine offer to help, but she got baby, i worried that she'll be tired, worry that if she tired she cannot rest cause site survey is a on going thing, we cannot expect customer to wait for us to rest de ma... Then a lot of walking, i scared she "over-walk"... She's like a big sister to me in the office, and althou we are always busy with our own stuff, we still care of each other de la... :) Its nice to know that you have someone like that in the office working with you.

But since 3 of my colleagues had to leave, i start feeling insecure wor... But i know Elaine and I will still keep in close contact if anything happens to us de.. **choy choy choy**

Ok la, back to my work liao... :)